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Our relationship with money often mirrors our emotional and psychological states, especially when influenced by past trauma. The RAW Money Cycle—Spend, Save, Give, and Receive—can reflect trauma responses such as flight, freeze, fawn, and fight. Understanding these connections can help us navigate our financial behaviours with compassion and insight.

Spend: Flight Response

When faced with stress or trauma, some people react by spending or going into debt impulsively. This flight response can manifest as an attempt to escape uncomfortable emotions or situations. Spending money becomes a way to distract from anxiety or fear, offering a temporary sense of relief. However, this can lead to financial instability and increased stress over time.

To manage this, it’s important to practice mindfulness in spending and debting. Recognise the urge to spend as a coping mechanism and explore healthier ways to address the underlying emotions. Engage in activities that bring genuine joy and fulfillment without the need for financial expenditure.

Save: Freeze Response

The freeze response to trauma can manifest as an overwhelming need to save money. This behaviour stems from a deep-seated fear of future scarcity or loss. While saving is generally positive, in this context, it can become excessive, leading to financial paralysis. Individuals might avoid spending even on necessary items, fearing that they won’t have enough for potential future crises. People can become paralysed by their fear of financial insecurity.

To address this, it’s crucial to balance saving with living. Understand that while it’s important to prepare for the future, it’s equally important to meet current needs and enjoy life. Set realistic saving goals and allow yourself the freedom to spend on things that enhance your well-being.

Give: Fawn Response

The fawn response involves pleasing others to avoid conflict or gain approval, often at the expense of one’s own needs. Financially, this can translate into giving excessively. People may find themselves constantly lending money, paying for everyone at a dinner, donating, or buying gifts to feel valued or accepted. While generosity is a virtue, it can lead to personal financial strain if not balanced.

To navigate this, establish clear boundaries around your finances. Practice giving in ways that do not compromise your financial stability. Remember that your worth is not defined by how much you give to others but by your inherent value as a person.

Receive: Fight Response

Receiving can trigger a fight response, characterised by resistance or discomfort. People might struggle to accept help, gifts, or even fair compensation for their work, feeling they must be self-reliant or undeserving of assistance. This response can stem from a need to maintain control or a fear of vulnerability.

To overcome this, practice gratitude and openness to receiving. Understand that accepting help or gifts is not a sign of weakness but a part of healthy interdependence. Allow yourself to receive graciously, acknowledging that you are worthy of abundance and support.

Integrating the RAW Money Cycle

By recognizing how trauma responses influence our financial behaviours, we can begin to heal and transform our relationship with money. The RAW Money Cycle—Spend, Save, Give, and Receive—provides a framework for this transformation. Embrace each element with Radical Acceptance With (RAW), approaching your financial life with compassion, mindfulness, and balance.

• Spend with Intention: Recognise spending as a necessary part of life and make mindful choices that align with your values.
• Save with Balance: Save as an act of self-care, but also allow yourself to enjoy the present.
• Give with Boundaries: Practice generosity without compromising your financial well-being.
• Receive with Gratitude: Accept help and abundance with an open heart, trusting in your worthiness.

By integrating these principles, you can cultivate a healthier, more balanced relationship with money, free from the shadows of past trauma. Embrace the journey with kindness and compassion, knowing that your financial well-being is deeply intertwined with your emotional and psychological health.